Mad Magazine

It's what all the smart guys in the future will read.



Kim got me this Schecter Hellraiser in Black Cherry for my birthday. Can't believe they finally had one in stock that didn't have bats on the fretboard. Coil taps on the volume knobs (yes, 2 knobs so I can go all Ace Frehley with the pickup switch).

How Hard Can It Be?

We use FileMaker Pro for tracking our bugs at work. It's shared among developers and testers/support. If one person is editing a record, nobody else can use that record; can't even scroll a scrolling text field if it contains more text than is visible (which is a pretty stupid UI peculiarity). Everybody knows this, but it seems like I'm the only person who remembers it when I use the db. Everybody else will leave records "active" and then go do something else or even go home for the day, preventing everybody else from being able to edit it. We've used the same db since about 1998, yet people still do this on a daily basis and I have to send them a message asking if they're done editing the bug, when I really know they just aren't using their goddamn brain. Like right now I'm looking at a bug that's assigned to me and nobody has any business editing, yet somebody in Peoria clicked into it or something and now I can't do a fucking thing.

I'm just bitching. This pisses me off. Ah! 21 minutes later he finally gets my email and clicks out of the bug.

The Bride Wore White

Everything was white.

For Blowing

That's what her lips are for.

Jimi

Here's a picture of Jimi Hendrix in the Army, playing a Danelectro.

A Prayer for Cool

This is great. A modern film shot on Super8. I love the expression Foo Man Lou gives after Smokey hands him a cigarette.

a prayer for cool from Marc Bencivenga on Vimeo.

Flustered by the presence of super smooth biker "Smokey", Foo Man Lou attempts to kick start his new chopper. Frustrated with Foo Man's failed attempts and lack of finesse, Smokey has just about had it until a visit from the divine changes Foo Man Lou forever.

WYSIWYG

Copped from my 1st-cousin-once-removed's husband's Facebook album.

Bob 1 Hand Injury

Bob Mothersbaugh sliced his thumb to the bone. Yikes! Maybe they could just glue a pick onto it.

Failed Circus Acts

This might hurt.

Teach 'em Young

Teach kids from an early age that it's OK to be fat, lazy hogs, overeat lots and lots of shitty food, and drive little carts around in a store. That kid'll be drunk, dirty, and pregnant by the time she's 15, if she can hold out that long. I bet she can already quote entire Larry the Cable Guy routines from having watched the DVDs over and over while munching on boxes of Ding Dongs and drinking 2 liter bottles of cheap WalMart pop.

*hic*

We did this song back in the Dial Tones. Too bad I didn't think of adding those funny sneezes and hiccup. Those are so funny!



This thing has a whole bunch of music videos just like this. Sunny D & Rum (Yum Yum) is sure to be racing up the charts soon.

Rap "Artist" "Helped" "Prevent" "Suicide"

HA! I say again, HA! This thug has been in trouble for weapons and drugs, and now some suicidal guy decides not to kill himself because some rapper said he could talk to him if he came down? Gimme a break. This is a total marketing ploy to show how nice and good this piece of shit is.

Godzilla vs. the Smog Monster

I had a hankerin' to watch this again a couple weeks ago, realized I didn't have it, and luckily found it at B&N. It's one of my favorite Godzilla movies. I remember wanting to see it so badly when it first came out. It was playing as a double feature at the Washington drive–in. I can't remember what the other movie was, but it was the perfect compliment to it. I pleaded my parents to take me, but it never happened. I was so pissed. It took decades before I finally saw it.

William Shatner, Humble Genius

From an interview in TIME, Oct. 4, 2010:

If you could share a secret about yourself, what would it be?

The secret is, I don’t know what the heck I’m doing. I don’t really know what I’m doing in anything: relationships, driving, talking to you.

Cars of the Rich and Famous (in Their Own Minds)

Black guys like to take big ugly 4–doors and make them even uglier by painting their favorite food logos all over them and adding big stupid wheels in matching colors. It's usually stuff like Skittles or Reeses. Aren't these choices a little obvious? I'm waiting for the Colt 45 and Kool Filter Kings cars next.

Stephen J. Cannell Died

That's too bad. He created some of the best TV shows around. Well, except The A Team. Couldn't stand that one.

Zappa Ad

This is weird. I was reading a Sgt. Fury comic book I downloaded and one of the ads was for Zappa's We're Only in It for the Money album. Normally, ads are for xray glasses, a lifesize Franekstein monster, Sea Monkeys, or a complete set of revolutionary war soldiers (oh boy). This is the first time I've seen an album in a comic book, much less one from Zappa. And look; it's expensive! It says so right there.

Clothes for Stevie Boy

So that's what I'm supposed to be wearing? Only if I can wear a neat hat with a little feather in it too. Just like Dad's.

Lily Munster

She was hot.

Sniff Sniff Gaaassssssssssss Phooey!

This made me laugh. I love the stuff that guy posts. Is the kid responding "phooey" because somebody cut the cheese? If he's supposed to be smelling a natural gas leak in his house, I don't think "phooey" is the correct message to send.