Ravi Hasselhoff

I was watching the Concert for Bangladesh today and was amazed at Ravi Shankar's sitar playing. It got me wondering how sitars work, which led me to the electric sitar, which led to Hooked on a Feeling. Most people know the original by B.J. Thomas (see electric sitar played live) and the nifty cover by Blue Swede. But how many have wrapped their brain around the David Hasselhoff version and the video (which looks as if it were made for purt near thirty dollars, most of which was booze and cheeseburgers)?

Ketchup Tater Chips

It sounded gross to me, but something urged me to try the Ketchup flavored potato chips from Old Dutch. The first few chips you try instantly make me think I'm eating some plain chips, and the ketchup from my burger dripped out onto them, so it's kinda gross because I think it's going to be soggy, like the ketchup had been on the chip for a while. But then they grow on you and I've bought them more than once. Still trying to find a vinegar and salt chip somewhere between the seriously mouth–puckering ones I had at Pot Belly and everybody else's that are a bit too light on the vinegar flavor, which end up being less sour than the fantastic Old Dutch dill pickle flavored chips.

Electronic Shower

Within the last year or two I've seen a Kohler commercial for a digital shower control with presets for each user. I had that idea back in 1991, and I made a q&d app to illustrate the concept. I guess I didn't know how to do color QuickDraw at the time (which seems odd), so I used patterns of various darkness to correspond to temperature, and the spray width corresponds to water pressure. It also looks like I spent more time on the About box than the UI. Heh. Ah, SuperPaint, how I miss thee.

See, I've always been annoyed by shower controls that are really touchy and have to be turned in the slightest increments to achieve your desired water temperature. I want to be able to punch a button, and within a couple minutes (it's a long run from the water heater) be able to step into the perfect shower. If it's much colder in the bathroom that day, a couple clicks of the Temp+ button would fix that. Anyway, the smart bastards at Kohler beat me to the final product. And theirs is in color.

Pussy Fight

Wanna see something pathetic? Look at these losers acting tough. Is this a gang fight? Looks more like 8-year olds throwing tantrums. Most of them run in, throw something, then run away. Watch the guy in an orange shirt, starting about 17 seconds in; he picks up a trash can that was laying on its side, runs to center frame, puts it down upright, runs back, picks up something else, shuffles around like he's playing basketball, picks up something else, runs back, etc. Maybe he's the closet homo in the gang that likes to tidy up.

Flesh Ripping Weasels

Holy shit! Could this magazine illustration be the source of the Frank Zappa album title Weasels Ripped My Flesh? By gummy, it is! The things you find out on the webberlink.

Well Duh!

That's my response to this post about cell phones causing tumors in your head. And in your crotch/guts if you carry it around in your pocket/on your belt all day. At least use a damn headset. Fucking cell phones.

This Bug Will Kill You

Holy dipsticks, talk about yer hot VWs. Cramming a turbo'd V8 into the trunk is one way to get the heater to work. I can't imagine a nicer job of plumbing the turbo piping into such a small space. Don't miss the 2 videos to hear its beautiful voice, and a short and very unassuming 2nd gear tire chirp that made me smile.

Practice

We had a good practice this afternoon, although John is still in Florida, so we were just a 3–piece. Craig is so humble about his playing. He's been learning our songs at a pretty good clip, and when he plays something a tiny bit wrong—like 1 wrong note in a big mess of fast 16th notes—he apologizes like crazy. Compare that with Jack playing nearly everything with the wrong rhythm, missing half the notes, and having absolutely no feel or technique. It's no wonder we're giddy about playing now.

I mentioned the Guess Who and we were all agreeing how much we like them, so we might end up doing No Sugar Tonight/New Mother Nature. We were kinda dinking around playing along. Emily & I automatically did the vocal harmonies and all that. It should come together quickly.

It's Ice Coated!

We were in Des Moines Saturday morning when we woke to a nice thick coating of ice on everything. Kim's mom got DSL hooked up last month, so at least I was able to check the interactive weather maps and see how things would be the rest of the day up through Minnesota. I figured we'd just wait and let the DOT trucks and the salt do their thing. Kim's sister and family took off earlier and called to let us know the roads were pretty good and they were doing 55 on I–35. We left after lunch and could do 70 or 80 because it was completely clear.

Getting into the car was the hardest part—trying to pound the ice with the heel of my hand without denting the metal or breaking the plastic, slowly fracturing it enough around the edges to allow the door to open. Turned the defrosters on high and loaded everything up before even trying to scrape the windows, then it came off easily all around the car. Her sister didn't do it that way. She was out there scraping like crazy. Which brings me to my annual Bad Steve story. He's her husband. She went through cancer this past Summer/Fall and is currently suffering a cold. When it came time for them to leave, he said, "why don't you pack up the car," which is what he says every xmas or other visit, but at xmas there's lots of extra shit to load up. He finally did go out and help with something after she yelled at him, but then he came back inside after just a few minutes, leaving her to finish scraping for 10 minutes or so. What a catch he was. Even if you're a lazy chauvinist, in this day and age, wouldn't you at the very least try to act civil around your wife or girlfriend's family? I've never been able to understand why he wants to look like a dick to her mom and the rest of her family. He'll even laugh about it, as if to say, "ha ha! See how I've turned your daughter into my slave! I make her do everything for me!" I humbly accept being known as Good Steve, which is how Kim's brother differentiated between the 2 Steves.

Scary Shit

Ya gotta wonder what the hell some people are thinking when they make a Santa Claus. Actually, they aren't scary at all compared to this:



I'm not sure which freaks me out more; the masks or the Glico food glop substance. This stuff courtesy of PCL LinkDump.

Xmas and Stuff

We sold our weight machine, which freed up a bunch of space in the basement. We'd thought about getting rid of it for the past few years, but since some of the band complained about not having enough space (how much space do you need to sit around and play a guitar?), we actually made a half–hearted effort to find it a home. A guy that Kim works with bought it. $100. Cheap. I eventually want to insulate and panel a couple walls in that area. It'd keep it a tad bit warmer in the Winter and give me something to tack my old posters up to. Give it sort of a retro feel down there.

I also threw out the old Peavey speaker cabinet that I'd used as my monitor for so many years. It was part of the Black Diemond PA back in high school. It was stored in the shed at our old house and the mice ate most of the speaker cones and deposited it back as mouse poop. Here it is in the mid–80s still with one (possibly) working piezo tweeter. It fit perfectly into our garbage can. Still had remnants of an "I brake for beer at The Pub" bumper sticker on the back. *sniff* I wonder where its mate is. Anyone?

Got maybe 3" of snow last night, so I did the majority of the driveway entrances and mailboxes again. I thought about doing the new neighbors' driveway, but I thought I'd better not in case they're the type who are all anal about it and don't want it scratched up, so I just did the snowplow pile at the end.

Kim & I had xmas tonight. She got me some things I'd had in my Amazon wish list for quite a while, including this cool Emergency! book and a new Joe Jackson live album. I saw a bit of the performance on a "coming attractions" segment on HD–NET I think, and wanted to hear more. It also includes the DVD. Bonus! She also picked out a nice Nikon camera bag. No more broken UV filters for me. I still have my aluminum camera case, but that's not something I want to carry around these days; too bulky.

I also baked and decorated a cake for Dad's bday, which is the 31st. We'll celebrate it during xmas. Perhaps I'll take a picture of it, if I think it won't damage the image sensor because of its horribleness. A cake artist I ain't.

Merry ho ho and stuff.

Rolling Love Shack

Nothing says 8–tracks and CB radios like a custom van with crushed velvet upholstery and a trippy space–themed airbrush paint job. ("Whoa, dig that giant frog, man!") Yeah, it has a CB, but sadly a cassette deck was chosen. Since it's wider than the custom mounting plate it's on, perhaps it replaced an under–dash 8–track deck that previously fit in that space. The 2 Sanyo EQ/amps are in their period–correct V configuration, which was the only way to make speakers of the day sound worth a shit. They look really familiar—I think somebody I knew had one of those.

The Slauson Cutoff

Roy Fern and the Tea Time Movie.



"…and Spurt the sperm whale in Journey to the Center of Gidget." Comedy gold. The "Bob's Dead Boy" sign just kills me.

eBay Goodies

The eBay collectable decades categories are so much fun to look through.

I have one of these GI Joe Action Team trucks! The satellite launcher thing was pretty cool. It just spun a propellor shaped thing, which took off and landed about 2 or 3 seconds later. Some satellite.

Cripes! $50 is the starting big for an old banjo pick?

Remember the last time the environment was trendy? They had a cool green flag.

Snow

We have maybe 6" of snow so far. The wind is picking up now. I went out put the snowblower to work. Man, it sure it easier to do the driveway without my truck in it now. Did all the mailboxes and the end of everybody's driveway, but that won't last long because the snow plow only went around the outside of the cul de sac and left the middle. Plus there were a bunch of cars parked around it. So he'll be back later on to finish the job of re-packing large heaps of heavy snow at the end of everyone's driveway.

I've Been Drinking Beer!

Well, half a Heineken in 1.25 hours. We had a neighborhood Winter Solstice get–together in the cul de sac. 2 fire pits, hot chocolate, and cookies. We finally got to meet the new neighbors across the street. Just a couple in their 30s, no kids, and a wiener dog that they let out into their back yard every morning at 6:30 so it can bark, which wakes up Joe & Heather and their kids (who live next to them), and then their 2 dogs wake up and start barking. At least we don't have to hear that. Other than that, the girl's pretty cute, so woohoo. We'll have to assign Joe the duty of snapping shots out their bedroom window if she does any sunbathing this Summer. Some of us headed into Geoff & Caroline's house after the rest went home, and it was there that I opted for the Hiene. I probably haven't had one of those since, I dunno, '86? '88?

Man, it sure is nice to be able to not have a limited talent pool in the band like we did when Jack was with us. When adding songs to our "songs to learn" Google doc, I had to listen carefully to see if there was anything too complicated, ya know, like an off–beat. My turn to pick is coming up, and I really didn't want to pick anything I'd previously added, so I went looking for other stuff. I added these to choose from:

Free Ride - The Edgar Winter Group
Thank You (Falettinme Be Mice Elf Agin) - Sly & the Family Stone
Sneakin' Sally Thru the Alley - Robert Palmer

We do well at funky–ish stuff with bluesy/scatty vocals, so Sneakin' would fit us nicely. We'll see how the rest of the band votes.

Charger GT

As seen in these renders, the new Charger would make a great looking GT racer. I especially like the Gulf motif, although somebody needs to give the artist a lesson in motion blur. OK, I could cut him slack if only front and rear were blurred, as if the camera lens was being zoomed in quickly as the shutter was released (but the blur would be linear from none in the center to max at the outside edges). But even that perception is thrown out the window when you notice the big Gulf logo on the door, half of which is totally in focus and half of which is horizontally blurred. Is the door made of rubber? Is there a drop of water on the lens to cause that distortion? Is the artist a talented dumbass? Did he accidentally click on that area with Photoshop's blur tool right before saving? I'm going with the dumbass theory.

Vee Dub

If I had to drive a Beetle, it would look like this. Too bad the Germans of those days didn't think like the Germans who came up with this amazing looking Mercedes, then the Beetle would've always been cool.

Toy Commercials

Here's a nice collection of '70s toy commercials, including 2 for SSP and 1 Smash-up Derby, and most notable is Screech!—starting at 5:30—probably one of the lamest games ever sold. I remember seeing that commercial as a little kid and thinking how fucking stupid it was.

Space Food Sticks

With a name that doesn't fuck around, Space Food Sticks were the snack for the modern space cadet, circa 1970s. With a unique and unforgettable flavor and texture, they were one of my favorites. I'm guessing I liked the chocolate and peanut butter flavors. I guess you can still get them online, like from Australia. One of these days I'll have to order some.

Sketch Guy

I made a Genius Bar appointment to see if they could tell me what the problem is with the trackpad in our MacBook Pro. Kim is the one who uses it most, but she'll get an unresponsive trackpad for maybe 5—15 seconds at a time, maybe a few times an evening. The keyboard still works during these times. People on the Apple discussions board seem to think it's the little ribbon cable that plugs into the track pad, which is directly beneath the battery, and the battery can push on it and cause the connector to not make contact. I dunno. Sounds iffy. That's a pretty tight little connector.

The Genius mainly checked lots of system prefs for 15 or 20 minutes, and suggested we run in a brand new user account to rule out 3rd party software. I'm sure it's not software. Plus, that won't rule out stuff that's installed in /Library, which I always do so it'll be available for all users. I have a feeling it was a big ol' wasted trip to Ridgedale. Not to excited about my first use of the Genius Bar. But yeah, trying to figure out an inconsistent problem that you can't duplicate at will can be a bitch that's best left to methodical methods. Still, it's a hardware problem, sure as snot.

On the way out, in the food court that leads out to the south–east parking lot, there was an old guy—maybe in his 80's—sitting there with a small sketch pad, sketching some guy in either pastels or colored pencils. I thought that was really cool. Then as I drove home I started wishing I would've stopped and talked to him. Does he do that to get out of the house and keep is art alive? Is he lonely? Gives him something to do while the wife shops?

Update: Running with a virgin account still showed the problem, like I knew it would.

Garbage Bear

I like the Japanese a lot, but man they can be weird. Here's reason #682; a garbage bag shaped like a teddy bear. I can hear Junior now: "Make more garbage so I can have a new toy to play with!" This one even has the bonus of some wonderful Jenglish.

Arnold Ziffel, USAF

I was at the Chanhassen post office today. They're a friendly, lively bunch there. The customer next to me was asking if there were any restrictions when mailing to a serviceman overseas. The clerk helping me told her that you can't ship pork to middle–eastern countries because if they touch it, they think they'll go to hell. He was wearing a black Santa hat. Then he said quietly to me, "so if we fill some bombers with pork and drop it on them, they'd pretty much scatter, right? Sounds like a quick solution to me." I laughed.

Factory Teams Dropping Out

Well fuck! Quite a few factories have dropped their teams from rally, LeMans, and F1 racing. That sucks, especially with Suburu gone from WRC and Audi gone from ALMS, as they're made the most exciting racing cars in the last few years, especially the diesel Audis making all others their bitches. Stop blaming the economy and carry on.

Photorealistic Painting

Holy cripes, this guy is good.

Tail Assembly Desk

Here's a cool use for an old airplane tail assembly. I don't know why they didn't leave the elevators on the H–stab for an adjustable arm rest. Just attach a pad to it and voila.

Step Stool

I started a quick & dirty project yesterday, a little step stool for our closet so it's easier to stack the clothes on the top shelf without everything falling back down. They key feature is that the bottom is smooth and the edges are rounded over so you can easily slide it to where you want it with your foot. The problem is, the carpet and pad give quite a bit, so it might be too. But like I said, it's just a Q&D with the top and bottom made from pieces of scrap 3/4” oak glued up into a panel that I've had around for years, and some shitty 1/2" plywood forming the vertical sides. That way, if it sucks, I can have fun busting it up with a hammer and throw it out. What might work better is if the each corner had a large, smooth foot. Cuz the way it is now is more like a single huge center foot. Unicycles don't stand up so good.

God damn it's cold. I shoveled the little bit of very dry snow we got yesterday. It was up to -3° when I did that before lunch. Tonight's low will be -17°. I should go xmas shopping tomorrow and/or Wednesday. That'll suck, but at least Eden Prairie Center has that little ramp now, which is a good place to park to avoid most of the wind. It's insane to build malls in cold climates without parking ramps. Old Capital Center in Iowa City has a fantastic ramp, is centrally located to all the students and residents, and has been there for decades. The new and stupid Coral Ridge Center out in Coralville has no ramp and is out in the middle of the fucking sticks, so it must be colder'n hell if you have to park way out there. Dumbasses. Tear it down.

Robots in da Skies with Diamonds

I was never into Transformers, probably because they started after I done growed up, and because I thought they were pretty gay. Although I do respect the people who actually designed the toys. I messed with one of the large plastic figures quite a few years ago when Kim's nephews were little, and I couldn't figure out how to fold it up into its car form or whatever it was supposed to be. Those were some pretty complex dealy–bobs.

Anyhoo, after reading Home Theater magazine's review of the Blu–ray, we added the movie to our NetFlix queue. We watched it tonight. I thought it was pretty entertaining. Sure, there were a half dozen or so scenes that were super corny and childish, like something right out of a cartoon for 5–year olds. But all in all, it was good action, fully developed characters, and even some pretty good humor here and there. Megan Fox and Rachael Taylor were the hot chicks, and were really quite good for this genre. Shia LaBeouf was pretty funny too.

The CGI is simply amazing. All those parts moving fluidly, and—according to the IMDB trivia page—were all unique movements every time. No cut and paste for the transforming sequence animations. They were formed from between 2000 and 10k pieces. I don't think I ever created a 3D model with more than 100 pieces, much less animate all of them. And I love little details like this, even if I didn't notice it in the movie:

When Frenzy transforms to the CD player after shooting his discs, the display of the CD player reads "NO DISC".

The Blu–ray looked and sounded amazing. The Dolby TrueHD soundtrack truly delivers what the audio people put into the movie. And not once did I see any video compression or motion artifacts, but the Elite helped out there.

Woman Naked Good!

A bittersweet day for naked women. First, Betty Page died. She could do it all; pinup, cheesecake, raunchy, sultry. There will never be another like her. (NSFW from here on out, but you probably guessed that.) Here are just a couple shots of America's slutty sweetheart.

Now to help cheer us up, Jennifer Aniston is pretty damned closed to naked in and on the cover of GQ. That's the luckiest necktie in the world. (Ugh, why'd they ruin the moment by mentioning Obama.) I wish she'd just get on with it and do the world a favor and pose nude. When you have the world's greatest nipples, it's only right to share them with the people.

Tiny Tank

Max Schaaf went to the Mooneyes dealie in Japan. A couple far out things in his photos. The multicolored metalflake tank in this set, and in this set, dig that tiny gold gas tank and that bitchin’ ’55 gasser behind the bike. Oh yeah, and I’ve been totally loving the picture he’s been using as a header lately. No pants and a simply amazing body.

Smelly Cat

Last night our singer Emily had her first gig as a member of an acoustic duo with Gina Frances from Orange Whip. The rest of Turnstyle showed up. I moved a slider or twisted a knob here and there, but with only acoustic guitar, keyboard, and 2 vocal mics, there wasn't much engineering to do after the first few songs. Their voices blended very nicely together, even though they have radically different styles.

They played in a bar/restaurant (Oak City in Bloomington) in the first floor of a office tower. Nice atmosphere and the sound system is even tied into the dozens of ceiling speakers. It actually didn't suck, sound-wise. But seeing a female acoustic act like that instantly made me think of Phoebe on Friends, so I had Smelly Cat going through my head between songs. And now—if my plan worked—it's in your head too. Mwuhahah.

I remember this one like it was on yesterday.



Anybody ever see these Kiss commercials? I never did.

I miss Madge. I always thought it was strange that the little cup she's soaking her fingers in had that paper liner—it seemed to be in every one of their commercials.

God 2.0

Never heard of Buckethead? Shame on you. He's one of this era's better and most inventive guitarists. He played with Guns & Roses for a while, done a few things with Primus, and lots of other bands and projects. Lots of his own albums too. What else? He wears a white mask and KFC bucket on his head. It's art. Here he is just sittin' around the back yard, doing what only Buckethead does (and he's wearing a plain bucket instead of his usual KFC bucket with a Funeral sticker on it). I like how at 4:00 he switches to a clean sound and does some classic yet reinvented country pickin' at about six-billion MPH.

Windoze Sucks

Quite the revelation, eh? Here's today's reason why this is true. I had to edit some source code files on my PC. After every few changes I habitually hit control-s to save my changes. You never know when a Windows app is going to hang itself by its own nuts. Anyway, I'm working away in a fast manner and all of a sudden I noticed that I had a system file in front when I hit Save, a file that is in the standard Windoze development folder, not one of our own files. Oddly, the Save worked, even though I had not changed that file in any way. I guess this means that Windoze doesn't think it's a problem that anyone can edit and save system source files. And it's stupid enough to go through with the Save even though it doesn't need to with an unchanged document. The result is that I now have to build everything again, because that system file is used by everything under the sun. Thanks, Bill. You're an idiot. Die.

Mouse Made from Mouse

While not the most ergonomic mouse I've ever seen, this steampunk mouse sure does look neat.

Venus Flytrap's Web Browser

Twist open a Colt 45 and light up a Kool Filter King, baby, it's time to surf the web with your very own web browser made just for blacks. I don't make this shit up. Way to spread the "we're all the same" message.

Solenoids

I wish I was 14. Seems like I had the time to do stuff like this then. Time I should've spent doing homework. Now I never feel like messing with stuff like this. Dunno why.



That little demo is very close to what I wanted to do with my drums. I wanted to mount solenoids (I called them doorbell ringers back then, cuz I saw how they worked when I took Mom & Dad's apart) on every drum and cymbal, then trigger them from a wireless controller, possibly with triggers mounted in clothing. Mick Fleetwood did the clothing–as–instrument thing. I was so disappointed when I saw him do it—why not somebody good? But my idea came before electronics and MIDI was widespread. Can't find a video of him doing it. (Golly darn!) But this kid made DrumPants! Too bad his timing sucks. Maybe he's Jack's nephew.

Vintage Racing

I caught 2 shows on Speed yesterday that featured actual vintage cars racing on my favorite track, Laguna Seca. Looks to be a short series of 4 episodes, with each incredibly short half hour episode featuring one type of racing: Trans Am, F1, FIA Sports Cars, and IMSA GT. I saw the first 2. The TA race featured early '70s American pony cars, including around 5 Javelins in the old Penske Racing colors. Fuckin' cool. The F1 race included tons of old jaw–droppers, including that wacky racer, the amazing/cool/weird Tyrrell P34 6–wheeled beauty that Jody Scheckter drove. It won easily, making the rest of the field look like they were towing boats. Below is an amazing video of Jackie Stewart testing a P34.

This might be a link to a schedule listing upcoming showings. It's worth a look.

Not Stud… Dud

Watch this prick try to get out of a ticket by flirting with a hot judge. And make sure you stick around until the very end of the video. It's so, so good when douchebags make themselves look like the giant idiots they really are.

Adobe Layoffs

In a SF Gate article, Adobe's CEO said:

Narayen said the chief cause of Adobe's problems is weaker-than-expected demand for the company's latest software, Creative Suite 4, which began shipping in October.

No shit. You take a handful of great apps that people like and bundle them together with a whole shitload of apps that very few give a shit about, sell it for 6 arms and 3 legs, take away the icons that people have been used to seeing for years and give all the apps idiotic icons, and you're surprised that nobody wants to buy it?

Bitchin' 'board

Dig these tuck 'n' roll skateboards.

Whee

Band practice today. Emily had other commitments, so it was mostly just to get Craig more familiar with our arrangements and work that sort of stuff out. To keep us from getting lost, I did the lead vocals. Or maybe "lead blahs" is more correct. Maybe "lead scatting". I don't know the lyrics to most of the songs we do. Plus, with my cold, I didn't want to push it and lose my voice. At one point I was singing about the various cars that were showing up on the Mac's screen saver.

Craig got a new little tube amp, Fender Blues Jr. I just noticed that all of the knobs go to 12 (click the little thumbnail in More Photos area). He's a sound freak, and he didn't like practicing through the little solid state amp he was using before. Me, I'm a drummer, so I can't hear that tube vs. solid state difference—maybe if I A/B'd two very similar amps. He only uses 4 pedals (a Sonic Stomp is always on) and uses a Quadraverb for reverb and delay, sometimes some flanging. He's also constantly tuning because he hears when something is the tiniest bit outa whack, which is nice to hear again. Jack would tune once at the beginning of practice, but it didn't matter since his technique was so bad, also bending shit outa tune any way.

Oh yeah. At the previous practice, I asked if he knew any Rush. He started playing The Temples of Syrinx from 2112. I joined in. That made my year. Later, Kim said I was smiling the whole time.

Who the…

Last night at 10:30 I heard a rhythmic scraping sound outside. It sounded like it was right outside our front door. Ah, it was the unmistakable sound of a snow shovel. At 10:30PM. Neighbor Paul was doing our driveway for some reason. At 10:30PM. It's a nice thought, but 10:30 is a little late to be making that annoying sound outside. But I guess I'd rather hear that than his pressure washer, which he uses about 73 times every year. He washes the deck, the cars (Clear coat? What clear coat?), the driveway (no shit), and more. Multiple times. So our neighborhood has that lovely RRRRRRrrrrrrrrrRRRRRRRRRRRRRrrrrrrrrrRRRRRRRR going on and on for anywhere from 15 minutes to hours at a time. I'd rather have him take off his shirt and fish in the pond like Brent's fine neighbor.

Cats Crack Me Up

All or most of these clips have been around the webonet for a while, but it never hurts to watch cats being goofy too many times. The clip at 0:37 with B&W and tan cats looks like Wolfie and Gordo, and exactly something they would've done. Wolfie would be all "I'm gonna git ya! C'mon! Play! Whee! Wap-wap-wap!" and Gordo'd go "yeah? How 'bout this… *tackle*"

What the…

Chiropractors must've loved this thing. So many new clients!

Found it while looking for a card for my brother's bday.

Lego My Jihad (or something like that)

These made me laugh. Little terrorist "Lego" men, complete with hood/mask/towel thing, AK-47, and rocket launcher. Just what little Johnny wants for xmas, or for hanukkah even.

Cute but Stupid

Just because you're extremely hot (well, the one on the left any way) doesn't mean you're well balanced. These girls were probably ignored and/or abused by their parents, or they both have the same mental condition that makes them think it's funny to sexually abuse old people. So much for "Minnesota nice".

Old Eames Manufacturing Film

This is cool on so many levels. Watch how they made classic Eames fiberglas chairs in the '60s. Long, but well worth it, especially the part near the end where a guy pours molten aluminum into a thingy and then a press casts the upper and lower bases onto the center support tube. I don't recall seeing them upholstered with leather, or anything else for that matter. I've only seen them in sleek bare fiberglas of assorted colors.

Cuz God Said So!

A man rammed into a woman's car who wasn't driving like a christian. He did so at over 100MPH. He'll undergo a psychiatric evaluation? Ya think?! Let's keep the religious nutjobs off the roads please.

Could be worse though. At least god didn't tell him to drive with his feet.

Wendy O'Hathaway?

So Anne Hathaway is either a weirdo sort of prude or very funny. If you're going to wear a shirt that is see–through under the bright light of a camera flash, a woman's choices are A) wear a bra or camisole or B) give everyone a thrill. But Anne chose to put tape or Band–Aids over her nipples. I've never been a woman with big luscious tits, but I'm pretty sure sticking something to your nipples would be far less comfortable than a good quality bra, especially when it comes time to remove it.

Or, maybe she did it as a joke, because she knew the cameras would be out (this was taken at some premier, award ceremony, or other type of public appearance), kind of a "ha ha! You thought you'd see my nipples!" Or she's a big Plasmatics or Missing Persons fan.

Or maybe she didn't think her shirt was see–through and only did it to keep her nipples from popping out? Naw. Black usually hides the pokies.

Click for big tits. And I still say she mostly looks like a nerd. OK, only above the neck is nerdsville.

What's Yer Pantone?

Got a favorite Pantone color? Still carrying your first Rubine Red color chip that you got as a kid? Have you memorized the CMYK process equivalents for your family room wall paint? Have no idea just what the hell I'm rambling on about? Well, get your color geek on and buy some Pantone–ish stuff, like cufflinks or a coffee cup.

Idiots

I've been working with some a guy at some company that paid us to write a script that will help them batch process thousands of Creator documents. First off, the dumbass keeps top-posting his replies. I just hate that, and it wastes storage space and internet bandwidth. At least learn to trim, dipshit. Second, he never answers all of my questions about what is happening when he runs the script. I can't see his fucking computer. If I send a message with 3 question marks in it, I'd better get 3 fucking answers back. Arg. I can't stand incompetent people. I hope we charged them a buttload of money for this. It's taking far too much of my time, because the guy's an idiot.

Oooo, sorry. I'm bitching and moaning again! It's all I do!

Star Wars, but Without Ewoks or Jar-Jar

or storm troopers or blasters or even outer space. George Lucas' senior thesis film is a short that shows Peter Brock driving a Lotus around Willow Springs. It's cool if you like vintage racing cars, racing cars that turn both left and right, or car racing films from that period in that documentary style. If you're expecting THX 1138 or American Graffiti or anything with a Wookie, well, stop that.

Saul Bass

Saul Bass was the guy behind those movie opening title sequences that are cooler than you or I will ever be. These sequences steal our dates and beat us in drag races. Turns out he's also the one responsible for the Bell Telephone logo, the one that has adorned every phone book, repair truck, and phone booth you've ever seen. Well, except the stupid ones that came along after they broke up Ma Bell into a bunch of crappy companies with annoying ads and jingles.

He did movies like Anatomy of a Murder (always liked that movie, and it has a killer soundtrack by Duke Ellington), It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World, and, my favorite of the bunch, one inspired by Bass, Catch Me If You Can, which also has amazing backing music.

Cocktail Napkins - Humor Under Glass (ha ha)

This flickr set has some cool old cocktail napkins. They range from the Confucius Say variety (“He who feed lemons to cat have sour–puss.” “Lady who swallow floor polish have fine finish.”) to the typical adult humor of the bar–set period. And no collection is complete without the heavy drinker funnies.

Steve Vai, Genius

And he's been cloned!

Alex & Neil

Budokan

Kim got me the 30th Anniversary release of Cheap Trick at Budokan. Haven't had a chance to put the DVD in yet. Just now ripping the Friday night concert, and the pair of discs that make up The Complete Concert, which I already have. But according to the liner notes, that release contained tracks from both nights, so maybe that means that this release has everything from the 2nd night. More likely, it's the same thing as the previous release. That's how these things usually go; you have to buy the same stuff again just to get the new stuff.

Caught a damn cold from a niece and/or nephew on turkey day. Last year's xmas was the same deal. Ack. Holidays.

Woop! Woop!

One of my favorite songs from the '80s; The Call doing The Walls Came Down. The guy has a great voice. A Peter Gunn type of rolling bass line. When they played it on XM last night on the way home from Iowa, I had the urge to see the video again. I don't remember seeing it in decades. I'm surprised MTV didn't have it on their site. I was always amused by the old guy playing keys in the video. I don't know if he was in the band, somebody's dad, or just the janitor in that location.

Slang

I was reading some article when a commenter used the word "wigger". I'd never heard it, so I looked it up. The part that I giggled at was the part that mentions the term "bama". Now I'm going to giggle every time I hear somebody use that shortened version of Obama's name. Infer what you will—I'm just sayin' it's a funny coincidence.

Being a Jerk Never Goes out of Style

28 years ago or so, this kid would've been named Doug Flynn. He was the spoiled ass in our class who thought it was funny to grab your pen or pencil and break it in half.

But wait, there are bigger jerks than that. Here are 3 big pussies right now. Yes, 16-year old boys can be pretty obnoxious these days, but I'm pretty sure you shouldn't bind, beat, and stab them. Unless they did something equally fucktardish first. And what's the deal with those names? Yonrico sounds like a company who sells things on infomercials. Neoni… that's what they called the Dodge Neon in Italy, right?

Black Betty

Whoa! Goofy cheap video, but I've never heard this version of the song. I'll assume it's the version on the album, not the short 2:35 radio version without the great solo section that scares dumbass radio programmers.

Panamera

A 4–door Porsche? You betcher ass. The Panamera has been in the works for quite a while—like anything else from Porsche, they do their research and testing before releasing something into the wild. Jalopnik posted a video that has some really shitty over–compressed audio, but even through that you can hear an engine and exhaust note that'll make any man's trousers tight. Here's a nice front 3/4 view. But here's my favorite, which shows its ass. I love how the roof extend all the way back to the bumper, which shows its 911 bloodlines. It also evokes the cab–backward design I love, as seen on other favorites of mine; the Cheetah, the 2001 BMW M coupe, Ferrari Daytona from this period, even the Pacer, had AMC made it a bit longer, shortened the height, and gotten rid of the buggy Matador headlights that gave it that dopey Heather Graham (or that pussy from those goddamn hobbit movies) deer–in–the–headlights look.

God

Stay tooned for the freaky claymation at the end.



Best arrangement of this song ever done. Dig the horns doing the guitar solo with the guitar. The video gets way off from the audio. Not bad sound for an audience camera source.

Not Suck Away

If it all comes down to the world going to hell (and with who’s in charge of the US now, it probably will) and we get stuck driving electric cars, at least it’s not just a bunch of messenger bag wearing hippies who are thinking about what we’ll drive—the gearheads are getting their grimy hands in there too, including the boys at Dodge, with a little help from a gorgeous kick–ass Lotus.

Ashlee Simpson dumber than Jessica?? No way!

Ashlee Simpson and her super faggy husband–for–appearances–only Pete Wentz named their kid Bronx Mowgli Wentz, just so it's initials would be BMW. Jalopnik says it best.

Choppers and Skateboards

Found a cool blog by some guy who digs old choppers and skateboarding. These two entries were right after one another. Far out. I love this Ducati old school cafe racer.

She's Tight

I thought backing my truck into our garage was tight, but this guy gets the gold though.

Life

Life Magazine and Google are putting the Life photo archive online. You can find hundreds of photos throughout the decades for almost any subject, like drive–ins or drummers (it's no surprise that Gene Krupa is right there at the top).

iTunes

Nobody has helped me figure out why my fucking router has been thinking that it needs a password for external web access, so fuck it. It looks like the modern FileSyncAgent attempts to sync every time something on the local iDisk has changed (when it works), so I’ll just store that file there instead. I doubt anybody cares what I’m listening to, but goddamnit, when geeky shit like that stops working, it pisses me off.

She's Pretty!

This is a woman? Looks more like some big Mexican guy that works at a chop shop in LA.

Furd Eff One Ugly

Ya know, the 2009 F–150 is one boring, straight–arrow design. It's like the truck version of the T–bird redo a few years back. It's something that my dad would call "sharp". In fact, it's funny how lame it is.

Let's try this new thing

I'm going to try Blogger—see how I like it. I need some text, so it's the Lorem Ipsum Dashboard widget to the rescue.

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Well, I already hate the editor. And I keep getting a post error with a cryptic error code. Looks like lots of people get this, so you just keep trying it until it finally works. That's what you get for free I guess.