Toynappers

What, they were planning on eating the toys?

Cecil & Beany

I thought it was called Cecil & Beany, but this says it's Time for Beany. Here's a bunch of photos from the show. Note the naked ladies drawn on the back of the set in the top photo.

Occupy Jobs

Saw this on Facebook. Take that, you smelly hippy losers.

Dummies

I hate it when people don't think. The family next door has a nanny (beats off–loading them to day care I guess). The nanny doesn't park in their driveway (which is large enough to hold 4 cars), nor does she park in front of their house. Instead, she parks right in front of our mailboxes. So every fucking day the mailman has to stop, shut off the engine, unbuckle, get out, walk 8', deliver the mail, take a picture of the car to document the reason he had to get out of his truck (I asked him about that once), get back in, buckle up, start it up, and continue on his way. I assume it wastes more fuel to restart the engine than it does to idle for 15 seconds. Then we come home in the afternoon and have to do pretty much the same thing, rather than just driving right up to the mailbox. I don't know why the USPS can't issue parking tickets to idiots who constantly park in stupid places.

Quadraphonic!

Shit! Electrophonic made some pretty crappy stuff compared to others (although the Electrophonic receiver w/8–track and turntable my brother handed down to me when I was a kid lasted for quite a while), but damn, they had some groovy design ideas. Check out this quad system from 1974.

Torpedoes

We need the old days back. Ya know, when men had secretaries and secretaries wore bullet bras and short skirts. This is from Ironside, season 1, episode 30, 1968. Click to make them bigger.

Alice Cooper Has Gone to Hell

I was a bit excited when I saw that Alice Cooper released Welcome 2 My Nightmare this year. Then I read that Kesha was on one track (What Baby Wants). Autotune is used heavily on that one and another (I Am Made of You). Nothing hurts the ears more than autotune. Oh, Vincent, what have you done? Bob Ezrin produced it. You'd think he wouldn't've done that to Alice. allmusic.com says that Patterson Hood (Drive-by Truckers) plays guitar on the album, but credits him as a composer. Even that doesn't excuse the user of Kesha and autotune.

Crunchy Bass

I got Kim a MarkBass Distorsore pedal for her birthday. It can make some far out sounds, from a little bit of vintage overdrive to full–on crunchy fuzz. With knobs for tube drive, low pass, high pass, and clean/distortion mix, the possibilities are endless. She thought it'd be cool on a few songs. It's about time she started messing with sounds.

A Little Present

If everything goes well Monday morning, I will be employed again, this time at MakeMusic. After my first year at MultiAd, they gave me a raise. As a token of self–congratulations, I bought myself a neat pen that I still keep at my desk. Nothing fancy. It was maybe $25 or so. Keep in mind that my starting salary there was really low for a software engineer. So yeah, a pen. Tonight I decided I deserved more for getting this much better job, so I picked up an Orange Tiny Terror 7W/15W amp and a 112 cabinet. I asked Kim if I have to take it back if I manage to not get the job. She didn't say anything.

Sporting Bazookas?

It took me a while to realize the bazookas in the lower–right of this ad were actually sights.

Pork Sammiches

We played the Vadnais Heights Heritage Festival last night. They had a showmobile (take that, Leo!;) for the bands to play on. It was much cleaner than the truck trailer they had in Foreston a few weeks ago. We had plenty of time to set up (I hate being rushed) and they were still serving pork by that time, so woohoo!! But, the pork was overly shredded and sitting in those big rectangular warming tub things (ya know, the white things you'd see food in at a church social), so it wasn't what I was hoping for from a pig roast. Still pretty tasty though.

We played 2 sets, then they had a fireworks show. They gave Denny a CD to play. He had to call the guy, hit start, and count off the first 10 seconds so the guy knew when to start the computerized fireworks show. The last shell exploded almost exactly on the last note of the song. Pretty cool. We played one more set, then as we were tearing down it started getting windy. Some tables had umbrellas, and they all blew over. Then when the little tent they had over the sound board blew over is when I started keeping an eye on the top of the showmobile. I could just see that breaking and come swinging down and smash us against the back wall. Just as we were getting the last half dozen things packed into our trailer did it start pouring. Close call.

The 2 new tunes went over really well; Kravitz' Are You Gonna Go My Way and Is She Really Going out with Him? (I sing that one).

What I Did on My Summer Vacation

Kim took the week off and we had a staycation. Went to a small zoo one day. Laid in the sun another day. I started getting a cold last Saturday. It slowly got worse and didn't feel like doing anything at all. I felt better one day and recorded some drums (hi Leo!). Turns out that was too much work and it set me back. Laid around another day. Went to a small lake to float around in the sun, but they don't allow floaty things (the sign says something like "No floatation devices (ie toys)", but we asked to be sure if that really meant "that is, no inflatable toys". Nope, it means everything (they need to reword the sign), but she pointed to a small beach about 1/3 of the way around the lake where we could use them. It was a 15–minute walk on a nice path, and only 3 kids were there. So we floated until the clouds got too thick. Cold got worse for the rest of the week/weekend, but I'm feeling better today. We drove out to a big orchard we like to visit every year (usually closer to Fall) and got a bunch of good stuff. One thing even contained apples this time! I grabbed an apple–rhubarb crisp. Oh man is that good. I love rhubarb, but nobody around here ever makes plain rhubarb pie, goddamn it. But I did get my annual jar of rhubarb jam.

Hillbillies

We went out to dinner tonight at Maynard's on Lake Minnetonka. Nice place, lots of richers, it being a major part of the lake/boating scene and all. An extended white trash looking family took 3 tables next to us. They didn't exactly look like they'd appreciate the place, the food, or especially the prices, but who knows how people come into money these days. Not long after they had been seated, one of the big'uns let her extremely ugly daughter (for some reason reminded me of a leprechaun) out of the stroller and was messing with stuff in the various storage locations in it. I thought, "holy shit, she'd better not whip out a tit and start feeding that little troll." Thankfully, that didn't happen. Nope, it was worse. She changed her fucking diaper right there with people eating all around.

Don't they have an all–you–can–eat food court at Wal–mart where these people should be eating?

Cheap Trick Equipment Crushed in Storm

We played in an open–side semi trailer this weekend and only suffered sweltering heat and humidity. Cheap Trick had it a bit worse.

I'm Psychic

I plugged in an old hard drive I haven't used for a while. On it was a bunch of music from somebody else's iPod they sold to somebody else. Kim & I went through most of it a while back. I was going through more today and got to the folders that start with 'T' when I came to a band named The Autumns. I just knew it was going to be some wimpy gay shit. Sure enough, the first song I tried began with some moody "I'm so deep and I'm wearing a cardigan" guitar picking and then the falsetto singing came in. Goodbye, files that are wasting space. Too bad I can't throw the singer in the trash too.

I just wanted to say that.

Google Street View @ Night

Cool. I've never seen night time Street View shots before. The tall building on the left is Le Cordon Bleu cooking school. My cousin Dondi is enrolling there.


View Larger Map

Wardrobe! Makeup!

I just happened onto this photo of Kim Novak, possibly on a movie set. She's getting hosed down by a guy wearing the standard workman's clothing of the era, complete with a well–worn cap (with metal vent grommets) and a ciggy. I miss that kind of clothing, although I never wore them.

Anyway, I just thought it was great that she's just standing there being squirted with a garden hose by that working type guy. Today an actress of that class would be surrounded by women and gay men carefully spritzing her with purified sea mist squeegeed drop–by–drop from the leaves of organically grown rubber tree leaves.

That guy is my hero, even though Kim Novak never did much for me.

The Jam - Slow Down

This might be even faster than Spare Change ever did it.

Ironside

I ran out of Kojaks on Hulu (the bastards only have 3 or the 5 seasons), so I've been watching Ironside on my lunches. I remembered very little about it, other than Raymond Burr fighting crime in a wheelchair. I also didn't know it started in '67. But here's something I sure don't remember. He and his team drove around in an old armored car (truck), customized with a wheelchair lift in back and hi–tech gadgets inside.

Senior Slants 1982

From the May 13, 1982 edition of the Keota Eagle, here are the Senior Slants for me and Leo. Actually, mine was in a different edition, but Mom cut it out instead of saving the whole page like she did for Leo. All that Jazz? Really? I must've been listing recent movies I'd seen or something. I don't remember The Octagon at all, but IMDB says:

A martial artist must defeat a plan by ninjas to create a worldwide training camp for terrorists.

Sadly, neither the Space Invaders nor the co–ed locker rooms were ever implemented. Note the little hunk of the Question of the Week—it was particularly clever that week.

Don't get nervous. Click to embiggen.

Sorry, We're Closed!

The moose out front shoulda told ya.

The Minnesota government is shutting down tonight, right before one of the busiest long weekends of the year. I don't know how many millions the state will lose this weekend just on the state parks that are closed and the fishing licenses that people won't be able to buy. And much will private business lose because people can't take a trip to a state park. What a bunch of morons. Morons for doing this at this time. Morons for doing it at all. Morons for letting things go to hell in the first place. Who's our governor now? Hmm, some guy named Mark Dayton. A democrat. Way to go, hippies.

Hendrix

Here's a great photo of Jimi getting his hair fixed while he reads a Mad magazine.

Chef Boy-ar-dee Pizza!

One of my favorite foods. Just add green olives. Makes the house smell great all night.

Battle Dessert

Ice cream surrounded by a fortress of Jell–o surrounded by gumdrop guards. This is genius!

Tostitos Nacho Cheese

Seems like I'm constantly telling Kim or somebody about these, but nobody remembers them. I bet Leo does. They need to bring them back. They were so delicious. I couldn't recall what the packaged looked like, but then I found these photos on flickr and went "oh yeah!"

I love the text in the bottom–right corner of the back about not being a litterbug.

'preciate It

The Beaver, Damn It

Beav finally gets some attitude.



And then he loses it.

Alice Cooper Comic Book

Wonder how many of these are out there?

Schlitz

What the?

Foam Storm

The problem with filming set–in–NYC Kojak in Los Angeles? Trying to come up with convincing snow. I've never seen them use foam before. It looks like they had the LAFD foam truck drive through and dowse the street and cars with foam.

Starfleet Miranda

An embroidery of the TNG crew… wearing fruit on their heads. Thank you, internet. I was afraid I'd never get to see that.

Beds

After sleeping on the same waterbed since around 1977 (well, I'm on the 3rd matress, probably the 4th or 5th heater), it's finally time to move on. It's just too hard to find stuff for it any more. Kim never liked it, but I don't see how. There's nothing better than a waterbed in Winter. I'm going to really miss a pre–warmed bed. I decided we needed to get a California king (same length as a waterbed) instead of a regular king so my feet have plenty of room. I hate it when I sleep in a short bed and my feet are all squished by the sheets. Yeah, it's harder to find sheets in that size, but you can order them online, and it's not like we have to buy new ones all the time. Hell, good ones last for years and years.

The mattress we liked best was one of the Tempur-pedics with a softer layer on top. It felt very waterbeddy for me and firm for Kim. I was hoping Kelly would be there in her little nighty to jump up and down on a demo model for us. (If you don't know who I'm talking about, you need to watch more TV.)

AaaaaAAhhh, the… Frensh

I might've posted this once before, but in case I didn't.

Flying my slightly scuffed Lotus Batmobile over Nürburgring.



I forget what I was driving, but it's nice to see that they put seatbelt warning stickers on the visors. Otherwise, I'd be laying on the ceiling, what with the car being all upside–down and stuff.

Clever

What a great TV show episode title: Close Cover Before Killing. Plus, Ponch makes an appearance. What's he doing in NY on Kojak's beat?

Zombies

Mixed–up or not, they're still zombies.

Guest Drummer

This (NSFW) never happens when I play my drums. Maybe I need to play strip clubs and burlesque theaters.

Devo Is Still Devo

Last night in Texas.



source

Flipped Out! Like, Way Gone!

There are some incredible cartoon images in this old pamphlet about drugs. Pretty wild stuff.

Mr. Rogers Stuff

Here's a bunch of interesting stuff about Fred Rogers.

Live Larger? Live Worse? Live Disgusting?

WalMart needs to change their slogan. This is not living better.

Intruder

Isolated guitar track from Intruder/Pretty Woman. I always liked those creepy elephant sounds (starting around 0:12) Eddie made with his guitar toward the front of Intruder.



And one of my favorites, Atomic Punk.

Nice 'stache, Moaneeshah

Really, they don't sell razors in the ghetto?

Star Wars Holiday Special

I expected this to be really cheesy and kitschy. Nope, it's absolutely lame. It's so gay. Chewie's dad is named Itchy and his son is named Lumpy. Really? That's the best they could come up with? Half of the dialog is just Wookie grunts and gargles. I can't imagine even a little kid liking it back then. Princess Leia and Diahahihnhann Carrrrollllllll sing. Jefferson Starship play space rock. Art Carney plays his annoying old self. Harvey Korman and Maude interact somehow. I let it load overnight and tried to watch it this morning between builds and stuff. After the gay circus hologram thing that Tubby Lardo Lumpy watches on his hologram table with built–in old tape recorder buttons, I couldn't take any more and ended up scrubbing through it to find the neat old commercials, including a horrible one for the union label with people singing and a CBS Newsbreak with a woman with the personality of a brick… a business brick, whatever that is. But look at cute little Valerie Bertinelli pitching Bobby Vinton's Rock n' Rollers special at 1:06:08 ("it's like Grease on wheels").

Tits and Chimps

What the?


Chimpies

Ali and His Gang vs. Mr. Tooth Decay

That's the actual title of this record. Ali as in Muhammad. It also features Frank Sinatra, Richie Havens, and Howard Cosell. I'm not making this up. I'm downloading it now.

Honky Isn't Spelled with an E

This must be a record of teenage bubblegum pop. No? Well then maybe christian adult contemporary? Preteen Disney sing–alongs? Liberal smelly hippy folk?

Thanks, Salem

I'm pretty sure the reason why they no longer allow cigarette commercials on TV was because this one was just too goddamn corny. It ruined cigarette commercials forever.

The Choppers

I understand what the artist was trying to do here, but didn't he look at the overall picture when he got done and think, "hey, that car is running down the road on giant man legs!" And what's with the midget wrestling? Finally, she's cupping her breast. Heh he-heh.

(As always, you probably need to click the missing image on that site to get the full-size image. Why doesn't he fix that?)

You're probably not surprised that I've seen this movie. Here, dig on the trailer, dad.

Don Knotts for Dodge

Web Fonts

Blogger finally added web fonts, since all decent browsers have been supporting them for a while now. Now if we could only rid the world of Arial and Comic Sans.

The Dirty Family Circus

source

Cute Nurse

Without a doubt, my favorite part of M*A*S*H the TV show is the extremely good looking nurse that's leading the pack, running toward the camera. She runs nicely. Turns out she was even cuter than she looked in that shot.

Adobe Acrobat Bug

Adobe might wanna look at their folders once in a while while testing. Looks like somebody thought they could simply append the folder path they wanted to create (Adobe/Acrobat) onto an existing folder's name (Application Support) and the folders would magically appear.

Franks and Something

Best photo I've seen this week.

Thank You, Internet

Where else could one casually browse his daily blogs and find unexpected treasures like these? Life is good. I've gotta get myself a monkey.