Free Rasputin Beard

Maybe if theaters gave out cool stuff like free Rasputin beards to disguise yourself from the forces of evil, more people would go to the movies.

Gross

Why does Tila Tequila exist? Does she serve any purpose to mankind? Is she actually a real human woman? I really doubt it. I think her only talent is making money by looking and acting like nothing I'd ever want to hump. I've got nothing aginst breast enhancement, but I do believe the purpose of them is to make a woman look more appealing, more delicious, yet still womanly and natural. That's where most of these current no–talent whores go wrong. It's great to show them off, but they might wanna pick their clothing with more care and not blatantly show their breast surgery scars to everyone, and get more believable, pleasant looking enhancements in the first place instead of these monstrosities shaped like lumpy beach balls that they all get. Here's a pretty much NSFW example (click again to enlarge if you have a barf bag nearby) of this plastic slut showing the world her Frankensteinian features. Cripes, even her head looks fake and gross.

Geek Shirts

This ad in an old Popular Computing has some really neat shirts. No, "neat" isn't the word I'm looking for. Perhaps "lame"? All I know is I want the "bilingual" one. And hahahahaha, they call it "softwear". Get it? It's a nerdy pun! Oh, those are the best!

Country Roads

For those not on goddamned Facebook, here's a tune from last week's gig. Be sure to switch to 480p or 720p if your connection can handle it. Not sure what happened with Andy there in the intro. But I do know what happened to my voice; it sucks!

Ronnie Reagan Speaks

Here's a record put out in 1961 of Ronald Reagan talking about the evils of socialized medicine. I guess Osambala never caught this one on his favorite hangout's juke box. I kinda like the very last statement Ronnie makes right at the end.

Al & Ed Were Kids Once Too

I found this photo on a blog entry about Van Halen getting back together a few years ago. Sure looks like Alex and Eddie to me. Alex is already chewing on stuff and Ed appears to be taking the drum apart to customize it into a Frankendrum.

Hogan's Heros Comic Books

Far out! Download 'em here! Looks like they have 6 of them. Dunno how many there were in all—9 at least.

Hand Painted Signs

I didn't think anybody still painted billboards by hand. This is cool. Stick around for some time lapse during the end credits.

Raceless Kidnapper

A 14–year old newspaper girl was kidnapped this morning in a small Minnesota town. This guy should be easy to spot. He's over 6' tall, 235 lbs, and has no race. Yes, his skin must be totally devoid of color. He'll stick out like a sore thumb. Or, since his skin is the absence of all color, he'll be like the Predator with his cloaking device enabled, so he'll be nearly impossible to see.

The fucking lame, pussy news media these days rarely say anything about skin color, race, or religion when describing bad people we should be on the lookout for. That would be profiling, and that would make them bad, insensitive people. Grow a pair, ya cheese–brained morons.

Mr. Ed Voted Prettier than Sarah Jessica Parker

Like that was a hard decision.